Open Love Letter to Google

Photo by Marek52

Dear Google,

It was in the late-nineties when you shocked me by showing me your lovely search engine, immediately leading me to break up with AOL and whatever the name of that other SE was (Steve? Altavista?).

Then the awkward growing years. After our first dalliance you became shy and withdrawn, then emerged like a flower bringing me image search. Your growing intellectual charm captivated me when you came out with google scholar and google earth. Always one to value counter-culture, I was attracted to your f-the-paradigm attitude by refusing to charge me for your services. I didn’t mind that you made me read porn ads or asked me to click on links to enlarge body parts I didn’t even own, I just appreciated your attention.

In the mid 00’s I flirted with another, Goodsearch. I couldn’t help it, his results were more tailored to my needs at the time. But I could never let go entirely, and quickly went back to your side as you released more and more integrated tools, bringing me chat, igoogle, reader, groups, chrome and more. Sure, I’ve always been a bit skeptical of your hippie attitude, spreading your services around like a 60s love child, but our inside jokes that you publicize on April Fools Day (Google powered by pigeons! You’re so funny!!!) remind me that you’re mine.

Today you showed me Google docs for the first time. I love you Google. I Love You.

Kisses,

Jaclyn

ps – for open letters written by people much more clever than I, see McSweeney’s